Rediscovering Kel… Again

Not really sure how to compose this entry — I don’t think (and have never thought) writing is my strongest suit — but I feel the need right now to put pen to paper….. or in this case, finger to key(?).

Marvin Conanan of Purveyr.com messaged me one day, inviting me to be a part of his project with Local Edition Coffee Shop called, “Are You Doing What You Love?”. This question struck me and stuck with me.

I was supposed to send a picture, but as luck (or fate?) would have it, my email apparently did not get through. Instead of being a part of this awesome installation alongside ~60 amazing people on Local Edition’s wall, I was not. And that made me question myself again, “Am I really doing what I love?”

In case you don’t know, this blog is a testament of a certain risk I took around two years ago: to put myself out there. I actually decided to start promoting my brand… ME.

To be honest, I didn’t know what I was doing! All I knew was that if an opportunity presented itself, I’d grab it. And if no opportunities came, I’d make them. Simple, right?

Back in college, I’d look out for interesting events to cover (and not as an official photographer, but just as a girl who went to the event with a camera), take photos, meet new people if I wasn’t too shy that day, post-process my pictures, upload them and write a blog entry, publish it, and share it to everyone and anyone who’d like to see it.

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I had no concept of failure because what was there to lose? I was a nobody who only had “trial-and-error-and-adjust” as experience. I was taking pictures, shooting and editing videos because I wanted to — because I loved to. And because of this way of thinking, I was able to meet and work with people I never thought I could. For one year, I was a sponge: absorbing everything I could learn from people. And in just one year, I saw a bigger world than my own just because I decided to open the door and step out…

…but that was back then, when I was still an undergraduate.

Right after graduating, I started work. Not after a couple of months, but days after my graduation (graduated April 28, started May 6). I honestly did not want to start right away, but I took this job mainly because I did not apply for it. I was not looking for a job, but it found me. (Call me irresponsible, but I did not submit my resumé to specific companies at all during our college job fair. We were, however, required to submit our resumés to our college career assistance org to be cleared to graduate.)

And because of my work hours, I had to:

  • say no to a few assignments for a magazine I was contributing to;
  • decline gigs (event coverage, dance participation); and,
  • minimize the number events I could go to after work because I had work the very next day.

(To put things into perspective, I’ll tell you a bit about the work I do. I’m a software engineer doubling as a team leader handling 11 engineers. I started out in development but am slowly transitioning to management, although I still make an effort to include dev work as much as I can (I don’t want to be left behind when it comes to technical skills, hihi). I’ve only been on the job for a little over a year. Work varies from being quite light to extremely heavy and stressful.)

It’s true what they say that “a developer’s job is never done,” which is why I haven’t had any time to get back into photography, at least not as much as I could back in college. And I miss it. Terribly.

Which brings me to the point of this entire post: I’ve decided to get back at it. Not full blast right away, but slowly. I’m giving myself 1 year starting this October to grab opportunities to shoot and to build my portfolio. Yay!

Really excited for this personal project of mine to rediscover myself (again). And I can’t wait to see what I’ve built (and done) for myself after one year. Hopefully, it will be a good year of growth and learning for me. And if any of you would like to work with me or help me in any way, I would be so grateful. 🙂

“Are You Doing What You Love?” photo by Marvin Conanan of Purveyr and Chief Clothing, type by Abbey Sy
First photo of me by Trish Zamora

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